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Thursday, November 04, 2004

smiles for sale

Everyone is going through something. If they're not, they're bored and probably wish they were.

These days it seems everyone's a little upset. The rain is beating down on all of us. In every sense. Routines become grey and inspiration is lost. The awakening is lurking close by, it's just taking too long.

We rush, we rush, and we rush, but where does it get us? I don't want to scarf down my food, I want to taste it. I don't want to run to work, my heels hitting the pavement. I want time to listen to the music coming out of every storefront. Give directions. Get a coffee. Be a fucking human being, not a robot.

But life gets to me. I want to arrive on time, I don't always have time to enjoy my food, there are places to go, things to do, people to see. I'm afraid that someday a life of commitment will drag me down.

Someday I'll want the house, the dishwasher, the job, the family, the soccer games, the board meetings, the dinner parties. But will it be too much for me? Will I even stop to think of the things I really want? Will my downtime become a collection of spa days and club med vacations?

I want a good life but I don't know what this means. Money, glamour, and a name to myself? A husband, kids, and a house? Or me, a nomad, a philosopher, a thinker, lost in thought, but maybe not in life. Or maybe they'll merge into one.

I want to work towards a life that makes me happy, but there's no recipe to happiness.


Here's some clips of home sweet home in residence:

DSCN0228, originally uploaded by gill.

DSCN0233, originally uploaded by gill.

DSCN0229, originally uploaded by gill.

DSCN0232, originally uploaded by gill.

DSCN0235, originally uploaded by gill.


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