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Friday, January 07, 2005

closer to what?

Even Jude Law's jaw line wasn't enough to distract me from the simple dialogue and repetitive scenes of the new film 'Closer'. The highlight of the film was listening to Damien Rice sing his sweet laments in the background. This singer knows love; pain; everything the movie was going for. But in a film that tried so hard for raw emotion and presenting the complexities of relationships...good vocals and strong lyrics prove to be much more powerful.

And so it is. Like many graduates I'm wondering what the hell to do with myself.

Is journalism for me?


Should I be in fashion? Styles, clothing, textures, fashion shows...the whole deal excites me. But will it end up leaving me feel vain and shallow? Even jobless?

Do I want to write for life? Or do I just love to hear my mother tell me she loves my writing?

I worry I'm too eager to please.

I want to be happy. I want to do everything. I have so much bursting inside of me and have no idea where to aim.

I need to get closer. To what? To myself. To my desires.

What happens if you look too closely and you don't like what you see?



Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ok Gill, let's do a little media studies. A lot of people are too sensitive to read the newspaper, but they don't lack information. The argument about young people not reading the newspaper says more about newspapers than it does about young people. Teachers lament because they read the newspapers, but I don't see them using what they've learned from that exercise to change the world.

They still know what's going in the world because media is everywhere all the time. Even if you don't write newspaper articles for a living, the scripts anchors read on TV and on the radio still need to be written, as do the teletext messages that run across the bottom of screens.

Chances are, if you write, you will write everything and everything. Jobs aren't thick on the ground in journalism, but a J degree from Ryerson is one of the most prestigious you can get, so your chances are better. Think of it as having a pair of diamond earrings in a safety deposit box. You don't wear them every day, but they're still there.

Why don't you do what everyone else does, whether they admit to it or not? Get a degree because it's better to have one than to not have one. It's better than working or lying on the couch for a year. And, while you're in school you'll actually have time to figure out who you are and what you want. At 18, no one expects you to have all the answers.

There are a lot of things your mother values about you, and writing is just one of them. I have a feeling you will be very famous for your intelligence one day, but maybe not as a writer. There are lots of ways to be smart.

Big love,

1:09 AM  

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