pick me up love
The morning is welcoming, but I don't want to get out of bed.
I'm afraid of getting up and facing how I feel. I dig deeper into my covers and dream of staying there forever.
The phone rings, and my roommate comes into my room and hands me the phone.
"How do you feel?"
It's my boyfriend, I called him last night and wound up crying for no reason in particular. I'm down, I've been pushing it away, but I can't deny that I just don't feel like myself these days. It's January and the post-holiday blues have settled in. These days I have to scrape for the self-confidence I seemed to be drenched in during December.
"Groggy," I answer, "but maybe better."
I eventually get up and slowly get ready for work. I paint some life into my face. I pull on an outfit to suit my mood, black on black, and slip out the door and into the cold.
The sunshine immediately makes me feel better.
At work, I talk to customers, give the best advice I can, and joke about the January blues.
The more I talk about it the more manageable it seems. Most people I talk to are feeling the same way. My roommate and I talk about wanting to scream and cry at the same time, and end up laughing about it, bonding over it.
Winter won't last forever. I know this. I know that I can't control feeling like this right now.
I plan on pulling myself out of bed every morning until it becomes easier.